I wish I'd written this...

"Peaches taste like gummi bear sweat filtered through the tear ducts of a unicorn."

and how are you?

Guess what we did today?

It was the most amazing, scariest thing ever... and girls with chubby cheeks don't look so cute at 12,000 feet.

Happy Birthday Mike Reid. xo

We celebrated Canada Day a few hours early...

It turns out that our American hosts, while wonderful, didn't know too much about their friends north of the border. After being privy to a number of O'Canada's that sounded nothing like, O'Canada, we decided that we would use the day to bring all things Canadian (including ourselves) to the Kiwis/Americans.

Dorky? Yes, but we kicked things off with teaching everyone the words to our national anthem. Mike then decided to have a music lesson, showcasing our preferred Canadian talent: the hip, the arrogant worms, bnl and stompin' tom (I'm contractually obligated to include at least one of the bands in this lineup). We concluded with a rousing version of 'Blame Canada' and pancakes.

I can't remember much else, which smacks of most Canada Days, but I do believe we also heaved a giant water tank into the attic via the roof, drank a little champagne, discussed our recent 'healing' sessions, finalized curtains for the van, visited the local cheese shop and made poutine.

I kid you not, that was my day.

Our new friend Kat, who is lovely, made us the hats we're wearing in the picture above. You're going to see a lot of them, as they have been deemed our official Canadian ambassador uniforms for the duration of ourtrip (we're hoping it leads to many free drinks).

Anyhow, all this to say I hope you have a wonderful Canada Day. Big love to all, especially my niece Isabel who is celebrating her first in Westville with the whole crew.

xo
ps. I couldn't finish off without sharing a photo of our first ever homemade poutine, fries and all. We have a lot of vegetarians onsite so we ended up making miso gravy and it was surprisingly delicious. If you want to try the recipe, here it is*







*We subbed in marmite for the nutritional yeast and masked the smell with some rosemary... b/c i haven't learned to love it - yet.

Today's lesson: How to avoid raising cannibalistic chickens

Chickens will eat anything - even chicken.

At our first wwoof spot, we fed our chicken leftovers to the ladies and they lost their collective mind.

To avoid raising cannibalistic chickens who will wreck havoc on their own eggs and hate themselves the morning after, be sure to cook your eggshells before feeding them to the flock. If you don't, your chickens may lay an egg and then turn around and eat it. Or, maybe they'll even start eating themselves.

I know, it's very strange. Much like eating your partner after mating (I'm looking at your praying mantis')

Anyway, why would you want to feed your chicken eggshells? Because they're a good source of calcium, OBVIOUSLY. Calcium is good for chickens.

That's all for today. Just another important piece of info I'll be able to bring back to the city.

xo

(note - did you know eating ONE chicken wing is equal to eating a mars bar? i don't even like mars bars - why am i doing that to myself?)

Yes, I am awful at posting...

But it's kind of like when you're out, having an amazing time and you have to remove yourself from the moment to remember to dig out you camera from your purse that's under a pile of jackets, to document that 'fantastic' moment.

Yep. Digging out the laptop is kinda like that. "This is really great, I'm going to go sit by myself and write about it." Not only that, but isn't it bragging? "Oh, you're having a downer of a day with deadlines aplenty? That's too bad. Today I made my bodyweight in cheese and topped it all off with some wine from... down the road." (Wine lovers - pick up the pinot gris from Mudhouse. It's delicious - and white!)

Whatever, I'll brag for the time being. I promise to be better moving forward, but today I'll give you the abbreviated version of our trip so far.

As you can tell, I arrived safely and Mike was in Christchurch (he had not, and has not, taken off with a beautiful kiwi as of yet.) We spent out first week in Cheviot at The Port Bed & Breakfast with DT and Johnny Mac. It was easy breezy with my major responsibility being to collect eggs.* Mike got in a bit of surfing and I got in a lot of sleeping. It was awesome.

*Sidenote* have you ever picked up a warm egg? When you think about it - it's kind of gross. It just came out of a chicken's butt.

We then headed off to Bluegums in Purau for a week with Mariele and Nirdoosh. We learned to make mozzeralla, feta and ricotta - and consumed more dairy than I ever care to again. Seriously. These people do NOT believe in skim milk. If you had milk in your tea - there would be a layer of butter on top. Sometimes I saw people just laying under cows finishing their PB&J sannies and waiting for a top up.

We're now nestled in at Birdsong in Akaroa. This is the first place that I organized for us and not Mike (and it's pretty awesome). For all those people who I showed the Birdsong profile too before leaving - the weird animal that was around duder's neck is a possum and they are not liked in these here parts. Actually, even the most peace-loving kiwi will off them with the closest blunt instrument / sharp stabb-y thing.

A couple key learnings from the first (almost) month away:

• I do not miss my computer. Although I do get nervy if I don't get to check my email daily.
  
• I used to have muscles. I may have them again, though it's too soon to say for sure.
  
• Mike is a dork. I continue to love him despite / because of this.
  
• No one I have met in NZ yet knows if chickens do it or not.
  
• Roosters are jerks.
  
• Sheep lesbians do exist - I saw them at it today! It might have been the highlight of our trip so far.
  
• I am the most corporate wwoofer to exist. Really, I feel like the suit at the party MOST of the time.
• I really love to read. I forgot that - but it's really great.
  
• Seals stink. Whoooooeeeee.
  
• Bing is awesome (you can't harrass me that much and not expect your own shout out.)
  
• I am going to learn to make absinthe. BRock - prepare yourself for my return. The farm I'm at right now makes booze that's 80% (no one has gone blind yet.) Start scouting locations for our speakeasy NOW, b/c Mikey and I already in planning mode!
  

Head over to Mikey's blog for some pics until I stop being lazy and post them myself. I love you all lots (I really do) and miss you bunches and can't wait to have a cocktail with you soon and discuss the mating rituals of NZ farm animals.

xoxoxoxoxoxo

stew.

We are alive...